I want to share an email that I received this week:

“Hi Karyn, I am a reporter with the Toronto Star. I’m working on a story about singles dating people in their condos and I was wondering if you might happen to know anyone who has inter-condo dated.”

Hahaha. Is this really what makes news headlines in Toronto? Whether the answer to that question is yes or no isn’t really the point here. What is the point is that this situation, while hilarious, could entirely be something you may find yourself in and need help on in the future. Right? You can’t be buying a condo one day and then needing to sell it the next because of a crazy neighbour-dating disaster! Investment disaster!

Dating a neighbour can be tricky. While there are obvious advantages to dating someone who lives within such close proximity to your front door, a certain amount of risk is involved with them being so close to it too. You likely went on many a showing with your Realtor to find the condo you now live in. You probably dropped more money than you’ve ever spent on anything in your life on it too. Never mind that this is the #1 place where you relax and let your troubles go; where you don’t have to care at all what you look like when you take the trash out. Rub a relationship up against your home and you may find a serious lack of privacy or worse, if you break up, eternal awkwardness.

I’m not saying don’t do it. I’m saying, abide by the rules so your dating life and your home-sweet life are in close harmony:

  • Make sure the neighbour isn’t psychotic.  Seriously.  If you’re dating someone in your building, you don’t want them knocking on your door whenever they feel, stalking you much less, and putting some sort of ownership over you.
  • Take everything very, very slowly.  Move about 3 times slower than you would in a standard dating situation.
  • Plan dates away from your homes. Although it’s convenient that you live close to each other, make the effort to separate your front doors from each other. Have him
  • Set some ground rules.  It will be quite difficult to maintain the autonomy you would usually have in a dating situation that is just beginning.  If you do not have the same ideas about independence and personal space, there will be trouble.  Be respectful and mindful of each other’s needs.
  • Be very clear about what might happen if it does not work out.  Are your schedules similar or opposite?  How often do you run into each other by chance?  What might happen if you stop dating and one of you is bringing someone else home regularly?  Just HOW awkward could it get?  If you really like living in your condo, you don’t want to have to move just because you took a rash leap into the unknown.  Are both of you mature enough to handle living there if things do go sour?  Make sure you have a good grasp on this.  It’s crucially important.

Have you been in this situation before or were tempted? Love to hear your thoughts on social comments.

Are you in the market to buy? Or did you not follow the rules above **wink** and have a home to sell now? Either or, please consider me your trusted real estate advisor for buying and selling real estate in Toronto. You can contact me HERE.

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